Suzanne Kornegay

"Thought of you with love today, but that is nothing new. I thought about you yesterday, and days before that too. I think of you in silence, I often speak your name. All I have are memories and a picture in a frame. Your memory is a keepsake, with which I'll never part. God has you in his keeping, I have you in my heart."

7 August 2009 You've been gone for six months this Sunday. Things I've been remembering about our time together (and this is just a bit): Our bus rides home from school in the 7th grade. Hanging out at lunch on the picnic table, by the school sign, at Charity Middle School. Going to the Expo and roaming around with you and Eve. You and I stopped long enough to see Maiya with her dance group. The first time I ate dinner with you all at your mom's, and Jimmy asking me to say the blessing. He didn't know how incredibly shy I was about that, but I did it anyway. For some reason this was a bit funny to you, but you were also proud. Sleeping over at your mom's. One particular night when we stayed up REALLY late, and you dared me to kiss the deer head of Jimmy's, mounted on her wall - the proposition still disturbs me - sick. Even more sick, I did it. Glad you got a good laugh at my expense. BEATING you DOWN at Indian Leg Wrestling - SUCKA! And the time you kicked me while were in bed trying to settle down to sleep. Always tryin' to start somethin'. Then I kicked you back. You stopped. Didn't know who you were messin' with, but learned your lesson and never provoked me again, unless you were ready to run, and then found out I ran FAST! ;]. I had never heard of this guy "Garth Brooks" before (nor listened to country music, but you said David was crazy about him, and you were too - mostly because he was), and you making me watch his concert on T.V. with you. You also introduced me to "The Judds" and their song, "Tell Me 'Bout The Good 'Ol Days." I bought that album when I got to Germany because of you and learned that song. My grandmother Eleanor's funeral day and the phone conversation that night. You hangin' at Grandma Carolyn's with us after we lost my Papa, John. Going to church with you and your daddy, the following Sunday after a sleep over a couple of times, and then going to your grandparents' home afterwards. Your daddy letting us drive his car in the circular driveway. Mr. Big's "I'm the One Who Wants To Be With You," and Garth Brooks' "Friends In Low Places" last skate circle we made with our friends at the Skate City before I was to move again. My 13th birthday party and last sleep over at my grandma Carolyn's, with you and Maiya (once the guys left, we ate and watched movies until we couldn't stay awake any longer) and saying my last "See you later" to you guys the following morning, before I left for Germany that night. Sneaking late night phone calls due to the 6 hour time difference from Germany to Wallace, NC. The letters (which you refused to let Charlie read no matter how much he pestered you. You were generous enough to share a couple of phone calls though). Coming home from Germany in the 10th grade - you were at the house THAT night to greet me. The confession that followed that you thought was a bigger deal than I did (boy were you relieved! - funny to me though). Making time for each other in the halls between classes, during my short stay, while at Wallace Rose Hill High School. The drive with you "uptown" that you spent an hour getting ready for (the whole time I was thinking "uptown" meant Wilmington - it REALLY meant cruising the main drag in Wallace between McDonald's and the Dairy O - I was mystified. Sleep overs at your dad's and ... well... you were there ... you know ... And yes, Nancy, we were good, it was the friends that came to visit while we were there (really, I AM being honest here, we actually made them a bit mad because we WOULDN'T be bad). The night on the phone, when you told me to tell my dad, that your mom said I could live with you guys and finish HS here. Like he was gonna say yes... crazy girls. Would YOU move to the other side of the country for a few years, without one of YOUR children? Gradually learning to enjoy the "uptown" cruises. The last cruise the night before moving AGAIN, this time to WA for a second time ... and the tears. The second round of letters (which I still have and have been sharing with Jamie ;). The phone call about "gettin' saved!" The phone call about Jamie. Jamie becoming your new best friend. The phone call about Brodie. Coming home for a week to visit after graduation to see family, and you, and meet Brodie (man did that kid CRY : o ;) The word "cholic" became a curse word to me). The phone calls between you and Jamie and his heartbreak over the potential future of his truck. Moving back home the next summer after graduation, a week before my parents, a week AFTER your wedding (STILL not happy about that). FINALLY meeting Jamie! Playing with (baby to toddler in a hurry) Brodie, riding his tricycle with him ;), and him cracking up at my British/ French/ Spanish/ and Australian accents as we played pretend while you cleaned before Jamie got home, and you interrupting us wanting to know what was so funny. Taking Brodie out "Trick-or-Treating" after I got off work (still wearing the vampire get-up that I had to wear at work that had him and you, and Jimmy and Bryant, staring at my teeth - Fixadent works wonders for realistic fangs). You cracking up at the story of the little boy that wouldn't come out from under the table at the restaurant, out of fear of the "vampire waitress." Okay, maybe a little TOO realistic. Getting into trouble (not drunk - just very inspired) with some Mexican beer and limes. The culture shock of "true country" (I mean, "Yee haw!") that you and Jamie put me through by taking me to the club, "Maynard's" : o And my need to escape by climbing up to the roof for a breather every once in a while. My taking over of the joint the next time we went when "8 Second Ride" played (and my buddying up with one of the band members who taught me how to two-step). The one time we went and I needed a breather, and you told Bryant where I was, and he was up on the roof with me in a flash (and in cowboy boots!) - my hiding spot GONE (we had a nice talk though so it's okay). Telling you guys about Jonathan. And to your amusement, me quoting Jim Myers's "Wayne's World" line: "He will be mine, oh yes, he WILL be mine..." That 4th of July, and the four of us at your mom's that evening before Jonathan and I went on to White Lake (Jamie a bit jealous of us riding on Jonathan's motorcycle - I miss the motorcycle rides). Jamie's warning to him to be good to me and you totally backing him up (surprised he came back over there with me - he WAS a good fella' after all). Jonathan becoming my new best friend. The fun and late nights (after we said "nigh-nigh" to Brodie ) the four of us had. Our adoration of Brodie trying to match clothes with Jonathan when he came over with me, and his admiration that he was a volunteer firefighter. Too CUTE. Reminds me of how much you looked up to David. So cute and sweet how your big brother was pretty much your hero. The move to another school and now rare visits with you and yours. The news of Colby. How amazing you were with Jimmy. Finally getting a break from school, getting a few days break from work, and coming home to play with BOTH of your boys. Couldn't believe how fast they were growing! Was so glad Brodie was big enough to truly knock a soccer ball around with ;) And Colby was not only walking, but getting that "running" thing down! You were so proud. Really missing you after my grandmother Carolyn passed on, and I relived memories in her house. My wedding day and you being there for me (AND being here when we got back to the house after we RAN out of the church to escape! We just came back to get our bags for the honeymoon so we could drive on to Raleigh, but there was no way you were letting me take off like that without saying goodbye - how did you know we were going back?! We told NO ONE). You and your family at the wedding reception at our house the following week. You at my first child's baby shower. The phone conversations that now completely revolved around our kids. And me coming to understand where you were, those first few years, after I came home to you as a mother and wife. That night at your dad's house when he told me how glad he was that I was back home for good, and how much of a mess you were when I left. Said there was no consoling you, you just had to work it out. So pitiful. That night when Jamie called about you, and I had to go see you, and the mess I became, when YOU left this time. The first time I went out with you and Jamie to your family church, Corinth Baptist. The last time I was in that church with you. And listening to all of the wonderful things that were said. Even your preacher called you on your sass and quite bold "tell it like it is" approach. True that. He also called you his dear friend, and shared his heartbreak. I believe a lot of those people there that day consider you a great friend. It made me feel good to know you were so appreciated. Our time alone at your funeral, and watching Evey play, as I sat alone with you, near the water of the pond where your body now rests and your memory is marked, and just WAITING for her to fall in... Even though you would've found it funny, I'm glad she didn't, 'cause it was February and COLD. Jamie came to me and said he was amused watching her though. I think he was sort of hoping for the laugh. He was laughing at the image in his mind. So, we did end up laughing at your funeral. Hating having to wait to see you again, but feeling blessed for being able to. You can bet when I see you again, you better start runnin', and get a GOOD head start too, so you feel like you have a chance, 'cause you WILL be getting PUMMELED for this! Making me not only cry (which you KNOW I hate to do), but making me cry in front of so many people. 'Cause this is way worse than the 7th grade departure. And this has hurt me worse than any thing ever has. Then, I'll pick you up and hug you heartily. I love you. You are missed. More than a klutz misses the last step.

24 March 2009 As I was driving back home from an errand today, I got stopped behind a school bus. First one I've seen since before Eden was born and I saw Suzanne off to Heaven. Seeing that school bus and having to wait patiently behind it, I was taken back to the day I met Suzanne. My family had come back home for a short stay between my dad's military duty stations. I was 12 years old, in the seventh grade, and had reconnected with some old childhood friends from our previous stay when I was 7-9. But the bus ride had no old friends. Suzanne was on that same bus and saw me sitting to myself. She came over and asked me to sit with her. That was the beginning of us referring to each other as "best friends." I was only home that year from late October to the end of January, so we bonded rather quickly. I moved to Germany next for 3 years and then home again sophomore year for another brief Nov. - Jan stay that we lived up while we could (with that red mustang), then to Washington State (for the 2nd time) for the next 4 years. I was gone for 7 years before I moved back home for good. We wrote several letters and made many phone calls over those years trying to keep up with our best friend. I came home the next year after graduation and we picked up where we left off. She got married and had her first son, Brodie, and I lost a lot of time with just her to her family. I was envious at first, that I couldn't get free time with her alone, I was unbounded and still wanted to cut loose. Marriage and children were unfamiliar to me and I was in no hurry to discover those unknowns. I grew out of that though. Her family was my family and I loved hangin' out with them just as much. Then I came to her telling her about this boy from school, Jonathan Kennedy. Gushing about him just as she had to me about her husband, Jamie, when they met back in high school. I had never reacted this way over anyone before, of course he had to meet them before getting the "seal of approval." Though I didn't act based on others' assessments, I did care what Suzanne saw in HIM. I kept her informed of the guys I went out with, but HE was the ONLY guy I brought to meet them. Then it was Jonathan and I going over to visit with them. Then, as Jonathan and I got more serious, we were spending more time to ourselves and I was spending more time with his family and friends and had made some new "unbounded" friends of my own. Then it was off to another school. She had another son, Colby. When I came back, Jonathan and I got married (luckily she was there helping me get ready, making sure I was pulled together nicely). The next year we started having our children and we fell into the "family thing" just as she had. Then, just two weeks before my 2nd daughter was to be born, and I'd be making another milestone phone call to her, Jamie called at 3:54 in the afternoon and told me that she had been taken out of this world. On a full moon evening, five months and five days after her 30th birthday, she was gone. I know the time he called because he called back later to check on me and used her cell phone again. My reaction to seeing her name on my caller I.D. was different this time. After speaking with him, I looked in the call log to see when it was that he first called. For some reason, I wanted to know the time, and remember it. As I sat during her funeral, I listened to the wonderful things that were said. Brodie would occasionally tearfully look back and our eyes would meet and my heart would hurt so bad. I had to distract myself, so I started counting to what pew I was in. I was in the 12th row. Then I remembered that it was the age of 12 that we met. Then I looked at Brodie, the age of 11, and saw how young we were, and began remembering those days. As Jonathan tended to Evey outside, playing on the church play ground, I thought of how she and her new little sister would be so fortunate to have such a friend. Two weeks after her funeral, I delivered Eden. I was taken back when I saw the time that she had been born - 3:54 am. I had to part ways with her again, only this time I don't know when I'll see her again. But I know I will. She wrote me a letter and called me when she "got saved!" all those years ago. So I am at peace about that. Of course, being the tough competitor she was, she just HAD to leave for Heaven first . . . As I sat behind that bus today, I thought of her. Now I'm going to devote some time tonight to going through that pile of letters that she wrote me over those years that I stored in a letter box. I'll remember some of the phone conversations. And I'll smile. And probably bust out in laughter... ; )

I went to shool with Suzanne. She was so kind and always had a smile on her face. Jamie I wish you the very best. I pray for you and the boys and think of you often. Tell the boys to be strong, they had a wonderful mom.

For those of you viewing this page let me tell you how awesome this lady was. She was my wife, my lover, and my best friend. This woman converted my life in so many ways I would not know were to start. GOD was surely in her heart! For those of you who have not found that person kep looking GOD has them for you I promise